Cassiopeia

a chapbook

Bobby Larson

—

Table of Contents

Preface

Again

Beatitude

Glow Worms

Driver of the Screw

Elegant Starfish

Dedication

—

Preface

Cassiopeia is a constellation of five stars, one of the 88 modern constellations today. This Cassiopeia is my first chapbook, a collection of five poems. Cassiopeia, for whom the constellation is named, was a queen in Greek mythology, punished for boasting about her unrivaled beauty. These poems consider both beauty and vanity in their text. They also appear in the order in which the stars are named (alpha, beta, gamma, delta, epsilon), so: “Again,” “Beatitude,” “Glow Worms,” “Driver of the Screw,” and “Elegant Starfish.” Thank you for reading, and I hope you enjoy it.

—

Again

how beautiful the earth from above

said the astronomer’s dove

as they cackled in their castle

as the cat slept in the corner

and I couldn’t stop from laughing

as they theorized and they thought

and as I struggled to string my mandolin

in my dream again

as I awoke

a mellifluous sound and a magnificent smell

your laughter and the latkes

and then a kiss and a laugh

the room was a rippling blur

not quite green and not quite gray

I played Joni and you jumped

a mouse had made its way

into our kitchen

—

Beatitude

blessed be the meek, the shy

the quiet, passive ones

the ones wearing masks each day

the ones with fear and

indecision in their hearts

blessed be the silent

mouths stuffed with clay

admiring birds and flowers

the tall, awkward ones

like ibises and echinacea

blessed be the listeners

of melodious noise

who find pattern in the purposeless

beauty in the broken

and revelation in the rhythms

of the awkward and unseen

blessed be the awkward

the bamboo shoots

and leggy sprouts among us

tender and warm

yet hidden and unheard

blessed be the forests

of ideas written in a furious scrawl

unshared in

secret books of poetry and prose

locked diaries masked

by mattresses and moody responses

blessed be the twisted

laughing darkly in the void

at drama and disaster

in our everyday lives

and all that fades

into nothingness

blessed be the dead

suffocated by pain

victims of a society

that did not care or listen

or who didn’t feel like

they were full of wonder

in their idiosyncrasies

in a world unfair

blessed be the angels

who reached out and touched us

who gave us our true names

who wanted to remove

the masks we had made

and see the bumps

the bites

and the bruises

of an uncaring unfeeling

and non-understanding world

blessed be all who read

and listen

and show kindness

and understand

and inspire

and shelter

and comfort

and love us unconditionally

and write

and paint

and sing

and dance

and make beauty

and appreciate it

in the absurd world

whirling around the sun

that we call home

—

Glow Worms

come into the night with me

tread quietly

and you can hear the voices

they say we are like glow worms

illuminating the path

but where?

where does it start?

and where does it end my darling?

where does it lead to?

where does it come from?

all we know

is that we illuminate it

with our wild hair

six feet apart

wishing we could kiss

and hold hands

we are like floating lamps

in the soft spring evening

are we the start and end?

two cairns in the moor?

do we illuminate

the path between us?

my path to you was miles long

and nothing at all

and what of paths to others?

are they like glow worms too?

but for now

it’s just you and me

illuminating the darkness

between us

with our words

and our laughter

this is our reality

Ecclesiastes said

that all is vanity

that you and I

are nothing new

under the sun

but under the moon

we are fresh

come with me

and we will hear the voices

that say we are like glow worms

illuminating the path together

the path to our future

to future homes

jokes and poems

to future love and laughter

to future arguments and tears

our pathway through the years

times to weep and to laugh

times to reap and to sow

we will cease to remember

and others will cease to remember us

so let’s travel the path together my love

into the shape-shifting future we grow

let’s combine powers as glow worms

and show more of where both of us can go

—

Driver of the Screw

can you hear me

through all that clatter?

what is the matter

with all the sounds I made?

what do you

and the driver of the screw

have in common?

can you hear me

with that mask on?

through my mask

made of paper plates,

tape, paint, and glue?

is the world just

masks all the way down?

will you reveal yourself?

will I?

am I just a tool

and you a fool?

or vice versa?

are you just a fool

with a tool?

can you see

through the ruins in me?

I can see

through rain

and wind and snow

can you see me through your mask?

are the eyes just sequins?

I can’t tell

are you the maker of the machine?

or just the operator?

or am I?

the difference between

the driver of the screw

and you

is that it is just a tool

and you are a fool

but one that can see

and think and feel

you are certainly not a screw

and neither am I

are not bits of metal

but a mass of sinews and complaints

and tears and bones

cacophonies of laughter

blood and skin

so, will you play with me?

take your mask off
reveal yourself

—

Elegant Starfish

you drew

an elegant starfish

with just a few sweeping strokes

it made me weep with joy

the elegant starfish

in a sea of Formica and linoleum

in a sea of IKEA manual speaking

and calligraphic boredom

in a sea of tile floors

and gnomic decor

we were

cypress floors white walls and

worn-in books and a forest of plants

art clocks and New Yorker magazines

cute little candles and a stash of

greeting cards for just-in-case

in a sea of double-layered polos

baggy jeans

sweatpants

spaghetti straps

studded belts

khaki and graphic tees

we were

cardigans that smelled like tea

musty flannel and slim jeans

and foliage shirts

sleek black slacks

and Seattle sweaters

crystal jewelry and high tops

in a sea of self-doubt

you would be better if

you would suck less if

you would be cooler if

you would be wiser if

you would be manlier if

we were

I am good enough

I am wise enough

I am strong enough

I am cool enough

I am beautiful enough

I am kind enough

I am enough

—

Dedication

Thank you astronomy. Thank you dreams. Thank you ex. Thank you laughter. Thank you Joni Mitchell. Thank you Beatitudes. Thank you quiet, shy, mysterious, creative, loving people of the world. Thank you Vashti Bunyan. Fuck you COVID-19. Thank you Ecclesiastes. Thank you future. Thank you Fiona Apple. Thank you noise. Thank you masks. Thank you screwdrivers. Thank you this mortal body. Thank you art. Thank you ugly things. Thank you beautiful things. Thank you self-esteem. Thank you Joanna Newsom. Thank you Alanis Morissette. Thank you especially to Fio. Thank you friends, family, ex (again), and anyone who has supported my poetry and art. Thank you all..

-Bobby